From young, we are encouraged to aim higher, aim higher, aim higher. We come to accept this as an immutable Law of the Universe when in fact it isn’t. There are times when the way to achieve your goal is to aim lower.

Before I explain what I mean by aiming lower, let me say that there is nothing wrong with aiming higher. Not enough people do it and settle for second best or mediocrity. Aiming higher is therefore important, and, when it comes to setting goals and trying to achieve them, I encourage you to aim higher!

But how good are you at influencing people? If you’re in a managerial or leadership position, you need to be able to influence those who report to you or look to you for direction. If you haven’t been enjoying much success in this regard, maybe it’s time to start aiming lower.

What I mean by aiming lower is that you need to start shifting your aim from people’s heads to their hearts. If you want to influence people, you have to appeal to, reach and speak to their hearts, not their heads.

Speaking to their heads may earn you their respect, but it won’t actually get them to do the things you want them to do.

That’s because, when we aim at their heads, we’re appealing to their logic. But logic is a poor influencer. Logic tells the alcoholic that if they don’t stop drinking they will ruin their health and their lives. And they probably accept and agree with the logic. But that doesn’t change their behaviour.

Logic tells the lazy person that he won’t be able to make a comfortable life for himself if he doesn’t get off his butt, find a job and start earning some money. But it won’t persuade him to actually do anything about it.

You see, logic has no influence over us. It’s a cold, mechanistic processing of information that doesn’t have our best interests at heart. If logic were a good influencer, it would result in people making all sorts of changes in their lives … But it doesn’t.

So if you’re trying to get people, whether they are subordinates in the office or your children at home, to do something by appealing to their logic, you’re wasting your time, effort and energy.

Aim lower. Drop your aim from their heads to their hearts. Instead of appealing to their logic, appeal to their feelings, desires and hopes, which all reside in their hearts. Before you think, “But my heart is only a muscle that pumps blood around my body,” think again. Your heart represents your body. The difference between your mind and your body is that your mind thinks – processes information – but your body feels. We have not been taught to recognise this so most of us live our whole lives completely unaware of the power of our bodies to feel things.

It was the feelings in our bodies (in our hearts) that prompted us to pluck up the courage to speak to that cute young person who, after many years of trying to win their affection, is now our long term partner in life .

It is the feelings in our hearts that prompt us to support a particular sporting team and cheer them on to victory. Feelings motivate us. Logic doesn’t.

If you want to become influential in people’s lives, therefore, lower your aim to speak to their feelings and you will find that you will win their loyalty and support and get them to not only do things for you but do them with passion and energy.

You can’t achieve what you want to achieve all on your own. You need people to help you. As you speak to their hearts, you will get the support you need to achieve far more than you ever thought possible!

Alan Hosking is the Publisher of HR Future magazine, www.hrfuture.net and @HRFuturemag. He is an internationally recognised authority on leadership competencies for the future and teaches experienced and younger business leaders how to lead with empathy, compassion, integrity, purpose and agility. He has been an Age Management Coach for two decades. In 2018, he was named by US-based web site Disruptordaily.com as one of the “Top 25 Future of Work Influencers to Follow on Twitter“. In 2020, he was named one of the “Top 200 Global Power Thought Leaders to watch in 2021” by peopleHum in India. In 2022, he has been named on the Power List of the “Top 200 Biggest Voices in Leadership in 2022” by LeaderHum.